This is how I feel about school.
Busy work, unnecessary subjects and fields of learning, and mindless memorization.
I’m absolutely reaching my breaking point. I can feel something coming up soon. I don’t know what it will be. Maybe I’ll get into a very colorful argument with someone in an authority position? Or maybe I’ll rip all of my school papers apart, recycle them, and run rampant through the streets screaming angrily at everyone? Maybe there’s something wrong with me? My anxiety is acting up like crazy these days. I need a helpful diety to point me in the right direction. Goodness, I’m going to cry!
I’m insanely jumpy right now. I can’t seem to sit still, focus, or stay in my chair for more than five minutes without feeling the immense desire to get up and run around. Are there any tennis balls here at this campus that I can play with? I guess this is one of the reasons I chose to do independent study. I can get up and walk around when I need to.
But something’s coming, something big. I can feel it in my legs and my racing heart and my mind, which won’t stop its million-thoughts-a-second. I want to run in a field for hours with a ball and I want to jump and hula hoop (in the hippie world, it’s known as “hooping”, wherein you dance with a hoop). Maybe this is my body’s way of foreshadowing my magnum opus coming soon. What will it be?
I can’t even write this post. Did I take my ADD meds this morning?